25 Parents, Stop Coaching from the Stands! (It's Ruining Your Kid)

High school basketball season is here, and Coach Rodo has a direct message for parents: **Stay off the sidelines!**

This episode tackles the massive issue of parents interfering during games, from sideline coaching to interrupting warmups for a hug or a dap. Rodo explains the damage this does, arguing that when an athlete prioritizes a parent's voice over the coach, they are signaling a lack of respect for authority—a huge red flag for college recruiters.

Rodo also challenges the notion that coaches intentionally bench their best players, reminding athletes that the **only thing they control is their effort**. Learn why you need to block out the outside noise and treat the court as the only arena that matters.

A critical listen for every sports parent, high school coach, and serious athlete.

#StopCoachingFromSidelines #YouthSportsParents #BasketballParents #CoachRodo #WinningRegardless #RespectTheCoach #CollegeRecruiting #SportsPsychology #HighSchoolBasketball #AthleteDiscipline

(01:50) - The Rule: You didn't apply for the job, so don't coach from the sidelines.
(02:50) - Parent Interference: When a kid looks at the parent instead of the coach.
(04:40) - Red Flag for Recruiters: Why college coaches are recruiting *parents* too.
(06:15) - Respect for Authority: What it means when a kid only listens to their parent.
(07:35) - The Parent Look: When a coach gives the parent the look to fix their kid.
(09:30) - Playing Time: Name me a coach who doesn't play their good players.
(11:30) - Referee Compliment: How to be the best parent in the stands.
(13:00) - Warmup Interruptions: The problem with parents giving dap and hugs during warmups.
(15:45) - The Car Ride: How to talk to your kid after a bad game (wait 20 minutes).
(18:35) - The Challenge: Why athletes need to ignore their parents' sideline shouts.

Transcript

0:00

Why are you talking to your pops during the game? And as a pops, why are you talking to your kid during the game? That's the coach's job. your kids not paying attention to anybody but you. That means they don't respect the authority. The only authority they respect is you. Name me a coach that is not playing one of their good players because they don't want to win. as players, the season is coming upon us. I want y'all to think about some of these things. I want y'all to think about how you're react to the crowd. Friends of these athletes, of these players, friends of the parents of these players that's coming to watch them. Leave the kids alone. Let them play. What's up everyone? I'd like to welcome you to another podcast, Coach Rodo's Winning Regardless, or episode of my podcast. Today, I wanna talk about the high school basketball season. First games are coming up. I think they start next week. Some may have already started, but you know, it's gonna be a lot of noise going around. You know what teams are going to be good, what teams are who should have made the team who didn't make the team. So, you know, there's gonna be a lot of that going on. But, you know, as a coach, the one thing that I want to talk about and I want to stress that is very, very important. And, you know, to help all of these other coaches out to who want to see it. But, you know, maybe have said it or, you know, some of the parents or somebody needs to hear somebody else say it. We got dog on coaches alone. No, I'm saying. If your kid isn't playing or is not getting the significant time that you believe that they should be getting when the game comes around, maybe, you you tell your kid to talk to the coach. You know, the worst thing in the world is when I go to high school basketball games and I'm sitting there and I'm listening to parents coach from the sideline, coach from the bench. And I hate more than anything. when a parent calls their kid during the game and the kid freaking turns around and looks at the parent. I mean, these are high school kids that do that. And it is the worst to me because I say, hey, when the job was open, you didn't apply. So, you know, why are you from the sideline thinking that you can coach when you had an opportunity to apply and chose not to? So why don't you just sit back and enjoy the game and enjoy your kid? You know, and it's not the kids fault, you know, because as a kid, how do you like not acknowledge your parent? You know, when my kid played high school ball, he was really worried about that when he became a freshman, you know, in high school and was, you know, on the JV and the varsity team. He was he was worried about that because, you know, I had been his coach his whole life. And so he was worried about how I was going to be. And. One of the greatest compliments he gave me afterwards when he graduated high school and all that, was like, Pops, I really appreciated the fact that I went through my whole high school career and you were never one of those parents. But I sure sat next to a whole bunch of them. I was sure in arenas with a whole bunch of them. And I would always just sit there and think and look at how the kids reacted to their parents. You know, some with disrespect and disdain and some would, you know, dads will be like, hey Jake, shoot the ball, shoot the ball more. They look at it and say, I know they're not running the offense for me or something. Why are you talking to your pops during the game? And as a pops, why are you talking to your kid during the game? That's the coach's job. And you get that so much. We are great coaches from the sideline or from the bench, but you know, the guy's got those jobs for a reason. They might not deserve to be there by your opinion, but that doesn't mean that you can be disrespectful as a parent to that coach. Because then what are you teaching your child? Because here's the one thing that I got boys that coach division one. I got a boy that coach at Penn State. I got a boy that coach at St. Louis. I got boys that coach some big time and have coached some. I got one at Michigan State. And I have coached some big time kids and some pros. And the one thing that they always say is, parents don't realize we recruiting they as$es too. It don't matter if you ain't even gonna know the mug that's in there because sometimes they don't even wear their school gear. You know, if they want to be seen and you know, oh, Tommy's all coming into gym tonight. You know what he look like. You know what time is those assistants look like because they have on their Michigan State gear, but what about the ones you don't know the coach's name and you don't know the gear that they got on and they're watching. But they watching you talk to your kid during the game or even on the sideline, getting up, walking along the side of the bench and talking to your kid while he's sitting on the bench and the coach is coaching the game. This is during high school games. Our parents would have never dreamed of doing something like that. And it messes these kids up so bad. And we as parents, not we, but because I don't do that sh*t, but we as parents, we don't realize how much we are. And we think it's cool. it is not for, for like a real coach and for like a uh parent who like does not want to embarrass his child or don't want anybody to perceive this child as a person who doesn't. Listen to authority because ultimately that's what you're doing with your kids not paying attention to anybody but you. That means they don't respect the authority. The only authority they respect is you. So it doesn't matter what other setting they in. It doesn't matter what power anybody else in that setting holds. If they're not you, they're not paying attention. And it is the worst and it is so embarrassing. Again, my college coach buddies say all of the time these parents don't understand. They sitting out there acting a fool. I don't care if your kid is six, seven, six, nine. If you over there acting an a$s, I don't want him because he gonna act just like you. And why would I want that in my program? And parents don't understand that. Some do. And those are the ones that just sit back and chill. Those are the ones that you barely, that people gotta point out who that kid's parent is to you at games because they don't say much. Or you might know that's the kid's parent after the game because they talked to him hugging and trying to send a ceiling. Like that's what I would do. I wait till after the game and then I see my son. Every time I would say anything to my son on the court is because I officiated high school basketball and college. If he was acting a damn fool, would, son, we don't do that. You don't show up in official. I don't give a damn what call he made if it was wrong or not. And you don't talk back to your coaches. Those were the only things, those were my bottom line, you can't do, get my reactions during games. And I apologize for that to him. But at the same time, he apologized to me for even putting me in that type of a situation because he understands and respects my authority to know that damn, I was embarrassing my name. You know, embarrassing my father, embarrassing my marshal name. That's not how I supposed to act. And we corrected. Sometimes I wait till after the game to say something, but it would depend on how heated he is because he was a very emotional kid. So, you know, I had to, sometimes the coaches couldn't get his attention. And me being the type of parent that I was, sometimes the coaches would even look at me and I knew what the look meant to say, hey, motherf*@ker, shut up. And he would. but it wasn't me trying to overstep the coach. Coach gave me that look because coach couldn't get to him. I sat back, I would sit back and chill with that, but when I needed to step in was the only time I stepped in. I was never one of those parents to say to my son, man, you're not shooting enough. Shoot the ball, don't pass it to him. Why is you giving him the ball? Like I hear this. on the sidelines and parents, y'all gotta stop. High school basketball is coming up. These kids are about to be working hard and these coaches are about to work even harder. Because there's a lot that goes into high school athletics that are behind the scenes where the only thing parents think about is the money that they gotta pay and if their son or daughter gets playing time. Now understand that playing time is predicated upon how you practice, you know. Everyone says, oh, the coach is mad at so-and-so because he's not playing them. Name me a coach that is not playing one of their good players because they don't want to win. I don't know no coach that does that. I don't give a damn how good you are if you're not giving the effort. If you're a good coach, your a$s sitting on the bench. And it's not to make an example out of you. And so as a player, you have to understand that it's because I'm not meeting my potential. He's not embarrassing me. I'm embarrassing myself by not going to my fullest potential. But yet still somehow we as parents, somehow we think it's the coach's fault. You know, these are conversations we need to have with our kids. You know, I mean, it is crazy because I feel now We're having the wrong conversation with the kids. And we need to be having the right ones, especially with these college coaches that's going to be coming up for all of these seniors, all of this. And now they're playing with big bucks. They're playing with big dollars now. So now these coaches' jobs are in jeopardy even more than ever. So now they're really trying to recruit the best kid and the best parent. And if you're a parent with one of the best kids, sit your a$s on the sideline and be quiet. Be like they used to say to us about refereeing. The greatest compliment they will give us when we come off and get done with the game is when the coach said, man, we didn't even realize that y'all was out there calling the game. You can't beat that feeling as a referee when they say that. So be that way as a parent. And as a player, You gotta block your parents out. That man on your sideline or that woman on your sideline is who you guys gotta, you females and you men have to listen to. Because for these two hours, he's in charge. She's in charge. So nothing else other than what your teammates say to you should matter. To all my athletes. Don't take your issues to your parents. Take your issues to your coach. You don't think your coach wants you to get better? You don't think your coach wants to put you in the game if you can help win? I don't know a coach that don't want to again. So it's asinine to think that the coach is deliberately not playing you when you're a better player. or when they know the effort that you can give is even better and you're not and it's because you're choosing to and because and the reason that y'all don't understand that we know is because we've seen it before. Because we always say the one thing you can never do is once you go high is slack off to go low because they you don't already showed us what you can do at the high level. So we always know when you slack it off now. Because we know what you could do at a high level, is why you should always stay at a high level. And if you're not, The coach ain't crazy. Coach ain't trippin'. Coach ain't mad at you. You're not given what you're supposed to give. You're not given all that you can give. That E word. The one thing you can control. But we as coaches know when you're given it all. Again, as players, the season is coming upon us. I want y'all to think about some of these things. I want y'all to think about how you're react to the crowd. want y'all to, don't look at your homeboy when you shoot threes or when you're there supposed to be locked in on defense, listening to the whispers of the crowd or your parents or whatever. There should only be one voice you're whispering to. You should be listening to, you should be able to lock everything else out. Parents. Shut the f*ck up and watch your kid. Enjoy it. Because it goes by fast. I enjoyed the hell out of it. But I also miss it. Which is why I couldn't wait to get back in the gym and just train with the kids. Just to be around them. I love going to their games. Because I love the games so much. I loved it when I was refereeing. I hated when I had to quit refereeing because of my knees. I hated it because I was so close to the game without playing and I missed it. Because once it's gone, it's gone. You know, my son went on to play some college ball, but that's gone now too. He's a dad, has a full-time job. You know, so again, the kids that call me Unc is where my resurfacing at is. And so therefore, I listen to all of these. I hear it now. where I said I would hear it with my kid, play, not as much because I was pretty much concentrating on him and some of the other kids that were on the team that I had coached and that I had known through the years and who also would ask me for, after the games, what did I see in their games and stuff like that. But now that I'm just sitting on the sideline, just chilling, coming and watching and enjoying the game, enjoying the kids that I train, it's funny what you hear. It's funny. what the parents tell their kids during the game. During warmups, I watched parents walk up during warmups and give their f*cking kids dap. Are you f*cking serious? Sorry for my language. Are you serious? When we played high school ball, if you weren't sweating during warmups, your a$s didn't get in the game. That's what a warmup is. You're supposed to sweat, not look cool. Warmup is a stretch. Going to the layup lane hard, shooting game time jump shots. Going up and dunking without touching the rim. That's warming up, not coming in looking all pretty, seeing who all showing up into the game, who all in the crowd doing this, walking up to your mom and your dad, you and your dad doing your little special handshake and all of that crap. Man, get out of here with that. And I don't care who get mad at me for saying that, man. Get out of here with that. because you've taken away from the main point, which is the ball game that's about to go on and the effort that these kids need to put in because you want to be seen. Because your kid is already going to be on Front Street. They're on the court. They're going to be seen. But no, you as the parent want to be seen. So you got to walk your a$s up there and interrupt everything that these kids doing. Because what you're not realizing is, They other play, their teammates is giving you DAP also. So now you got all five, you got six or seven of the kids that's supposed to in the goddamn layup line, rebounding and paying attention over there giving you DAP because you went out there to give your son some DAP or you went out there to give your daughter a hug or something like that. Instead of, you know what time the game start? I understand sometimes we just got off of work and the only thing we did was get to the game. All we could do was come to the game. Shit, we had parents like that. And guess when they gave us dabbing hugs? After the game. Because I'd be damned if Coach Cook saw you go over there and give a friend, a parent, an auntie, an uncle, or even a goddamn teacher a handshake or a hug while we in the layup drill. You know what his next thing was? Go into the locker room and get dressed and you can sit your a$s right there next to him and watch the game. Because it shouldn't happen. That is embarrassing. And some coaches will not say anything. And it's not because they're scared or they're nervous. They just understand that it won't be received well because... you would think that I'm telling you not to greet your kid or you think I'm disrespecting you in front of your child. I would love to see a coach one day say, man, the next kid I see shake hands with somebody that in on this team before the game start, your a$s is getting dressed and sitting on the sideline. Would love to see it. I guarantee you it will stop at all because man, that is such a distraction to the game. That's such a distraction to the kid, such a distraction to the coach. And as a coach, I hate that. Because we had all the time before the game. We had all this time before the warm-ups. All you had to do was be there on time. Whatever reason you not there, and you just there to be able to do that during the game, whatever your reason is, it's not cool. You know, it's... I mean, there's really not much more I can say about that. So again, I just want everybody to understand that with high school basketball games about to start, uh let's respect our coaches. Let's respect our players. Let's respect the referees. And kids, let's respect the coaches. Let's respect the referees and let's respect the game of basketball, women and men. because it's gonna be over before you know it. And we can't waste time on things that have nothing to do with the game. So let the outside noise be the outside noise. And let the court noise be the court noise, and let's keep it on the court. I want to challenge my young basketball players to not listen to your parents, not listen to your friends on the sideline. If it ain't a coach, Hear it. There's a difference between hearing and listening. Hear it. But if you're in a game and you're in a warm up and all that, I want to challenge you to not pay attention to the homeboy yelling off the stand, yo, let's go, baby. Turn around and give him a shot. No, don't give him no shot out. I would challenge you to, when you in the layup line, and your mom or your dad comes over and say, hey, we're doing layups right now, mom. We're doing layups right now, pops. I see you after the game. You can still run through the line and acknowledge your parents. You don't have to go physically leave the line, leave the drill, leave what you're doing to go over there to hug and shoot dad. You can wave. And parents, want to challenge you to leave your kid alone. Friends of these athletes, of these players, friends of the parents of these players that's coming to watch them. Leave the kids alone. Let them play. Comment afterwards. Even if you mad, do like I used to do. I wasn't mad, you had a bad game, I let him tell me. We get in the car, I wait 20 minutes on the drive home. And how you feel about the game? Now that he's calmed down. Because the last thing that a kid who had a bad game once is when they get in the car. The first thing they hear is, mama, pop's going in. You should have did this. You should have did that. Because believe me, they already know what they should have done. They already know. They probably beat the, that's the one thing that I used to learn about my son. That motherf*@ker beating himself up way worse than I can beat him up. So the only thing I can do now is just beat that springboard. Tell him the good things that I thought he did. which was always his effort, never had to worry about that with him. But that's how he grew up. He grew up coming up the way that I did. And I've never, his high school career, ran out to give him that. I walk into the gym, shoot him the peace sign, and in layup drill, he shoot me the peace sign. Let me know, I see you, pops. That's all you need is acknowledgement. Parents. Who the hell else in the stands do you want, are trying to impress by giving your kid DAP? Everybody know who their daddy or their mama is? You don't have to make it about you. Like they're there to watch you or see you. Like the game is going on and they turn around and they looking at you because you that kid's fair. Because you went out there and shoot them DAP. Peace sign works just as well. Because if you're really doing it for the right reason, isn't it? To have the acknowledgement of your child, to let them know that I'm here and I got you. You can do that by sight. You don't have to put it on front street. So let's stop that. Let's leave these kids alone. And kids, let's work hard. Let's have a great season. Let's have an uninterrupted season. A coaches only season. I listen to my mom, my dad, my friends at the dinner table or when we all having, you know what saying, kicking it, going to Applebee's, having some half off appetizers or something. Y'all more than welcome to talk to me about the game now, but don't say sh*t to me during the game, during warmups, game day, if your name ain't coach. I would like to thank you for listening to another podcast of Coach Rados winning regardless. Thank you.